Dear Mistress Maeve,
I have a problem, and I know that if anyone can help, you can.
I'm a 26-year-old female, and I've been seeing this guy for about three months. For the first time in my life, I'm totally stoked about a guy. We're both totally open about sex and having fun so far, but I wish I could give him a better blow job. I've always had this same problem where I gag when a guy gets little more than his head into my mouth. I'm a smaller girl with small features, but can my mouth really be too small for oral sex?
I know he really likes receiving oral, and I'm afraid he'll get frustrated with my overly sensitive gag reflex.
Mistress, can you give me some tips?
All Choked Up
Do not fret, my small-mouthed friend — there is a future for you in oral sex.
Ever since Linda Lovelace defied the gag reflex in 1972's Deep Throat, people have measured a good blow job by how many inches one can swallow. While I could give Lovelace a run for her money, I'm not so shortsighted as to think deep throating is all there is to giving a successful blow job. Besides, most of the feeling is in his head and the first third of his shaft — not at the base.
Girl, you need to work out your own technique that highlights your unique talents. Try gripping his shaft with a lubed hand (or two, depending on his length) and using your mouth on the head. If you move your hand and mouth in tandem, he most likely won't know where your mouth ends and your hand begins. And don't forget to work his entire area. If you use your mouth and tongue on his scrotum, taint and ass (if he's willing) and stroke him at the same time — he won't miss the deep throat thrusting.
If you're still adamant about taking in more of him, try some new positions: Taking him into your mouth from a new angle may do the trick. Instead of the typical kneeling positions, try going at it from the sixty-nine setup. (More fun for you, too!)
Above all, remember to have fun. There's no rule book when it comes to oral sex. If you shine in other oral areas, your deep throat deficiency will be an easier load for him to swallow.